Send any Dits/Warries that you would like to add to this page to terry.crane@live.com.au
I was a Sailor once (Received from Tex Ford)
I LIKE standing on the bridge wing at sunrise with salt spray in my face and clean ocean winds whipping in from the four quarters of the globe, the ship beneath me feeling like a living thing as her turbines drive her through the sea. I LIKE the sounds of the Navy the piercing trill of the boatswains call the syncopated clanger of the ship,s bell, the harsh squawk of the main broadcast Tannoy and the strong language and laughter of sailors at work. I LIKE Navy vessels, nervous darting destroyers, plodding fleet auxiliaries, sleek submarines, purposeful minehunters and steady solid carriers. I LIKE the proud names of capital Navy ships Australia, Melbourne, Sydney. I LIKE the lean angular names of Navy destroyers ANZAC, VAMPIRE, VENDETTA, VOYAGER, BRISBANE, HOBART, PERTH. I LIKE the tempo of a Navy band blaring through the upper deck speakers as we pull away from the tanker after refuelling at sea. I LIKE the pipe "libertymen fall in" and the spicy scent of a foreign port. I LIKE sailors, men from all parts of the land, from city and country alike and all walks of life, I trust and depend on them as they trust and depend on me for professional competence, comradeship and courage, in a word they are shipmates. I LIKE the surge of adventure in my heart when the word is passed "special sea dutymen close up". I LIKE the infectious thrill of sighting home again, the waving hands of welcome from family and friends, the work is hard and dangerous, the going rough at times, the parting from loved ones painful but the companionship of robust Navy laughter, the all for one and one for all philosophy of the sea is ever present. I LIKE the serenity of the sea after a day of hard ships work, the beer issue, watching flying fish flit across the wave tops as sunset gives way to night. I LIKE the feel of the Navy in darkness the masthead lights, the red and green navigation lights and the stern light, the pulsating phosphorescence of the ships wake. I LIKE drifting off to sleep lulled by the myriad noises large and small that tell me that my ship is alive and well and that my shipmates are on watch and will keep me safe. I LIKE quiet middle watches with the aroma of kai on a winter's night. I LIKE the bow slicing through the mirror calm of the sea and the frolicking of dolphins as they dart in and out of the bow wave. I LIKE watching the track disappearing back towards the horizon knowing that it will be gone in a short time and being aware of the fact that we were not the first or will not be the last to leave our mark on the water. I LIKE the foaming phosphorescence at night, dancing from the wake of the screws as they constantly push tons of water astern of the ship, carrying us to our next exciting rendezvous. I LIKE hectic watches when the exacting minuet of haze grey shapes racing at full speed keeps all hands on a razor edge of alertness. I LIKE the sudden electricity of "action stations" followed by the hurried clamour of running feet on ladders and the resounding thump of watertight doors and hatches as the ship transforms herself from the peaceful workplace to a weapon of war ready for anything. I LIKE the sight of space age equipment manned by youngsters clad in No8's and sound powered phones that their grandfathers would still recognise. I LIKE the traditions of the Navy and the men who made them and the heroism of the men who sailed in the ships of yesteryear.
In years to come when sailors are home from the sea they will still remember with fondness and respect the ocean in all its moods, the impossible shimmering mirror calm, and the storm tossed green water surging over the bow, and then there will come again a faint whiff of stack gas, a faint echo of engine and rudder orders, a vision of the bright bunting of signal flags snapping at the yardarm, a refrain of hearty laughter. Gone ashore for good they will grow wistful about their Navy days, when the seas belonged to them and a new port of call was ever over the horizon, remembering this they will stand taller and say: I was a sailor once, and numbers will never be the same again:
Kit: 1's 2's 3's 4's 6's 8's 10's 10A's
Punishment Number 9's, 10 days stoppage, 7 days cells And can someone explain why are 2 4 6 heavy? Only a sailor knows... I was a sailor once and I look back and realise it was not just a job, it was a way of life. A family where shipmates became brothers and part of a team. I was a sailor once and I still can't forget my Official Number. When medical science receives my body, as they examine it they will find a tattoo inside my brain with my Official Number and an anchor where my heart is. I was a sailor once and I Like the Navy because even as times change, and the youth takes over from the old seadogs, some things never change: The bitching is still the same. The old days were always harder The recruits were always greener Official Numbers were always smaller Men of steel and ships of wood The goffers were always bigger The girls were not as good looking I recently had the good fortune to attend a naval reunion and sat back and observed that friendships and respect are still as strong and binding as ever. The ditties are still as interesting - only the tale gets bigger. If I haven't been there, it doesn't exist - or we blew it off the map. Only a sailor knows. I was a sailor once and I know. I was a sailor once, I was part of the Navy and the Navy will always be a part of me, that's why I love the Navy.
How To Simulate Life in the Royal Australian Navy (Added by Russell Maudsley)
Buy a Skip Bin, paint it gray and live in it for 6 months straight.
Sleep on the top shelf of your closet.
Replace the door with a curtain.
Four hours after you go to sleep, have your wife whip open the curtain, shake your foot, shine a flashlight in your eyes, and mumble, “Sorry mate - wrong rack”.
Have your next door neighbours come over each day at 0600 - blow a loud and warbling whistle - and then Shout: “Call the Hands, Call the Hands, Call the Hands - Wakey, Wakey, Wakey!.”
Do this once more - just in case.
Build a wall across the middle of your bathtub and move the showerhead down to your chest level.
When you take showers make sure you turn off the water while soaping.
Every time there is a thunderstorm, go sit in a wobbly rocking chair and rock as hard as you can until you’re nauseous.
Put lube oil in your Evaporative Cooler instead of water and set it to “high”.
Don’t watch TV except for movies in the middle of the night. Also, have your family vote on which movie to watch, and then show a different one.
Leave your lawnmower running in your living room for 24 hours a day for the proper noise level.
Have the paperboy give you a haircut.
Once a week blow compressed air up your chimney, making sure the wind carries the soot across to your neighbor’s house. Laugh at him when he curses you.
Wake up every night and have vegemite on toast. Optional: tinned snacks you smuggled on board.
Set your alarm clock to go off at random times during the night. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get dressed as fast as you can, then run into your backyard and break out the garden hose.
Once a month take apart every major appliance and then put them back together again.
Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5-6 days before drinking.
Invite 100+ people you don’t really like to come and visit for a couple of months.
Shit, shower and shave with these people.
Install a fluorescent lamp on the bottom of your kitchen table and lie under it to read your books.
Raise the threshold and lower the top sills on your front and back doors so that you either trip over the threshold or hit your head on the sill every time you pass through.
Once a day randomly throw your household pet into the neighbours swimming pool, and then run through the house yelling: “Man overboard!”
When your other half is cooking the evening meal - run into the kitchen and sweep all the pots/pans/dishes off the counter onto the floor, then yell at them for not having the place “secured for sea”.
Put on the headphones from your stereo (don’t plug them in). Go stand in front of your stove. Say (to no one in particular) “stove manned and ready”. Stand there for 3-4 hours. Say (once again to nobody) “stove secured”. Roll up the headphone cord and put it away.
When it rains. Get two empty coke bottles, tie them together, and hang them around your neck. Go outside and stand in the rain for four hours. From time to time look through the coke bottles and observe the horizon and lightning.
Put on a clean white suit, then go change the oil in your car.
Jason pistol / Needle gun the aluminum siding on your house after your neighbors have gone to bed.
Make your family qualify to operate all the appliances in your home (i.e. Dishwasher operator, blender technician, etc).
Submit a request form to your father-in-law, asking if it’s ok for you to leave your house before 3pm.
Received this via email on 30/12/2012 from Warren Treadgold.
G’Day Russell and Peter,
I have been contacted by Craig Shewell and in fact spoke to him today. It was one of those ”blast from the past” moments but a very welcome one to hear from him and we had a great chat. He referred me to your website as well as advising me of a reunion of the 38th Mark and Morrow Division JR’s coming up in March 2013. Unfortunately, I don’t think I will be able to attend as I am going to Singapore in late February and while they won’t clash it is a bit close and I doubt if I will have the funds to get to the Gold Coast as well. I missed the 50th Leeuwin anniversary too unfortunately.
I gave Craig Phil (Buzz) and Kris Honeysett’s last known address, which coincidently is just around the corner from where I live in Morley WA. As I said to Craig, Phil lived there until about 6 years ago, at around the same time they lost their son in a car accident. They then moved to Newman and I had a PO Box number in Newman to which I used to send a Christmas card every year but this year the card was returned. I’m sure, however, they still own the house around the corner, the address of which is xxxxxxxxx Morley 6062.
You may remember Archie Hann. He was the PO in Marks Division prior to the birdie PO Whitting (I can’t remember his first name but liked to refer to himself as The Fox). Unfortunately, Archie doesn’t appear in any of the class photos in the website. He passed away about 12 months ago. Rob Scott was a LSME with Morrow Div along with Ziggy Karow. Rob is a good mate of mine and lives at Margaret River WA. Rob doesn’t appear in any of the photos in your website that I could see either. The last I heard of Ziggy, he was working as a financial advisor here in the West. Neil Donaldson was the 2 ringer in Marks and the last I heard of him, he was living in QLD somewhere.
Peter, I think I may have bumped into you at Port Adelaide in about 1977 when I was on Vampire??
Anyway, I look forward to hearing from you guys. In the meantime, compliments of the season and all the best for 2013.
Cheers
Warren Treadgold
Received by Steve Phillips:
One day, while an old Sailor was cutting the branch off a tree high above a river, his axe fell into the river & sank immediately. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"
The old Sailor replied that his axe had fallen into water, and he needed the axe to supplement his meager pension.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe.
"Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The Sailor replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver axe. "Is this your Axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the Sailor replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron axe. "Is this your Axe?" the Lord asked.
The Sailor replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the old guy's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the Sailor went home happy.
Sometime later that same Sailor was walking with his woman along the river bank, and his woman fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my woman has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE. "Is this your woman?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the old Sailor.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The old Sailor replied, "Oh, forgive me Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE, You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ. Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my woman. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. And Lord, I am an old man not able to take care of all three women in a way that they deserve, that's why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE."
And God was pleased.
The moral of this story is: Whenever an old Sailor lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and only for the benefit of others!
HMAS Leeuwin 1972
Marks and Morrow 38th
